Thursday, December 15, 2011

Has anybody seen my willpower?

So yeah.  Remember how I said I was going to behave and eat at home more while on vacation, and blah, blah, blah?  I fail. 

I can absolutely tell a difference since I have been on vacation.  I'm eating more fast food.  Well, more food in general, actually.  My clothes are still fitting, but I feel just...blah.  I kinda feel like a giant grease ball.  Actually what worries me is I'm getting over the giant grease ball feeling.  That means my body is getting used to the crappy foods again.  Oops.  I have gotten in a few workouts though.  Not as many as I'd planned, but some.  I've done Turbo Jam twice, the stretch workout from P90X once, and I went to a martial arts class with my cousin.  I was only able to do the warm up stuff with them becaues they were working on a specific demo for a show coming up, but DUDE.  I definitely got a workout.  I'm still sore!  In other news, I discovered I do, in fact, have obliques, and they are mad at me now. 

As much as I love my family, and love seeing my friends, I'm ready to be back at my own house with my husband.  I miss him hardcore.  I'm done vacationing without him! 

In other news, my Christmas spirit is missing, too.  As much as I hate that everything in my life goes back to that stupid miscarriage, it kind of does.  Usually, the day after Thanksgiving, Christmas comes out.  This year I was still angry and bitter and didn't feel like messing with anything.  Then I left on vacation, and Christmas is like tomorrow or something.  It kind of snuck up on me this year.  I'm hoping that Christmas spirit kicks me in the face when I get back to Alaska.  It's usually my favorite time of year, and I kind of feel cheated!


  1. Aw Sweetie, I'm sorry. I kind of have an overdose of Christmas spirit, so I'll share with you. Just get your butt back home where you belong and I'll share! :)

    Also, I may have to come work out with you when you get home, just so you don't slack off. ;)

  2. @Ducky: hey! lay off! You get her ALL THE TIME! She'll be home on Saturday. Till then, she's ours!

    Yay for workout buddies!

    Ash, I'll try to pump you full of cheer today while we shop :) Love you!

  3. Sending you a hug or two (or 50 if you need 'em). It's hard to be happy at holiday time when you've experienced loss. Give yourself time to feel something special (maybe a small Angel ornament on your tree that you know is special to remember your angel by). When I had my m/c I found it therapeutic to finish the baby scrapbook I had started for that baby. Hard, but it was closure too.

    Be safe traveling home.