According to the scale, I have lost zero weight so far this month. Depending on the day, I may have even gained a pound or two. Ack. Thing is, I know exactly what the issue is.
The issue is that I'm getting burned out. Not on wanting to be healthy, and not on exercise. I actually love going to the gym. I love how it makes me feel for the rest of the day, and I love how because I do go, I can do other things in life that I couldn't before. Like walk up the 5 steps to my second-floor apartment and not be out of breath. LOL I don't have any desire to stop counting calories, because I know exactly what will happen if I do stop. I'm just tired I guess. My heart isn't in it like it used to be. It's more a habit now, which I know is a good thing. But it's harder for me to get up in the mornings and go to the gym because I've lost that fire. I kinda don't care much anymore.
I know the logical answer would be to either a) relax on it and take a "break" from being so strict. Go on maintenance mode and just focus on not ganing, or b) push through it and just suck it up.
The problem with option a...I just did that! That's what the entire month of December was! I ate junk food for a month. It's very difficult to go back to eating non-junk food after that. The issue with option b...when I tell myself I HAVE to do something, I get rebellious. I know it makes no sense because nobody else is telling me what I can or cannot do. But it's kind of like when you tell yourself you won't think about chocolate cake. What's the one thing you will think about? Chocolate cake. So telling myself "you have to eat only healthy food and no junk and you will work out 5 days a week for an hour. Period!" is the best way to get me to do the exact opposite. LOL
So my solution? I splurged this weekend. A lot, actually. And to be honest, I feel awful, physically. I'm tired, I'm lethargic, and all I want to do is sit around and veg out. I don't like this feeling. I'm hoping that going nuts this weekend, and feeling how crappy I used to feel all the time will help motivate me to behave from now on. LOL
In other news, I did hear back from RESOLVE. I returned my Host Application, and I should hear back within two weeks. If everything on the application looks good, they will want to schedule a phone interview. If that goes well, they will put the group on the list on the website, and send me a packet on how to get started marketing the group and such. Yay!