Olive Garden made me go to the gym.

So, Anchorage FINALLY  has an Olive Garden.  It's been open for a week, which means if you want to get in, you have to get there an hour before it opens and stand in line.  So I did.  It was -10 outside.  Where I stood for 45 minutes.  In my defense, the breadsticks were fresh and seriously amazing.  However, I'm good not going again until my birthday in June. 

Then Sunday was volleyball, so I got a good workout then too.  Even if we did go to a local brewery and I ate way too many carbs.  But the grilled cheese sandwich I had was pretty hardcore tasty, so all those calories were worth it. ;) LOL

When the alarm clock rang this morning at 5:00 a.m., I was all set to turn it off and roll over and go back to sleep.  Then I realized something.  If I can stand for 45 minutes in -10 degree weather for breadsticks, I can roll my lazy self out of bed, suck it up for the 5 minute drive to the gym (and that's only if I catch all the red lights!) and work out.  So I did.  I'm glad I did.  I missed the gym.  I miss how great I feel after, and how it just sets a productive tone for the day. 



Well that was fun!

First off, I am a terrible, terrible gym rat.  Truth.  I haven't been to the gym in a week.  I know.  Go ahead and judge me.  I can take it.  I can list off excuse after excuse.  I'm really good at it.  Watch:  1) I didn't get enough sleep.  2) I slept funny and I'm sore.  3) I have a headache.  4) WAY too cold.  -12?  I am SO not rolling out of bed.  5)  I've got some other stuff I have to do this morning and won't have time. 

Honestly though?  It comes down to this:  I don't want to roll my lazy self out of bed.  Sure, all of those are legitimate and reasonable excuses to not work out.  But really?  They're just excuses.  I know this. 

But -12 really is too cold to go anywhere at any time, much less 5:00 a.m. LOL

Now, on to the fun part.  Hubby and I did go to the gym this morning.  I did my 30 minutes in the express circuit (think Curves.  Same thing), then moved over to the arc trainer, just like usual.  I was having a heck of a time keeping my heart rate down.  I'm huffing and puffing and trying to slow down without the machine turning off.  I was just kind of looking around trying to not focus so much on what I was doing.  (that usually helps.)  I glanced over to my left to the wall of mirrors.  I didn't recognize myself!  I seriously looked around for the skinny chick who got on the arc trainer between me and the wall!  It was fabulous!  And it wasn't even the seam on the mirror.  You know how sometimes if two panes of mirror are stuck together, and you stand right there, you look skinnier from a ways back?  Yeah, no, this was right smack dab in the middle of a panel.  SO excited. 

In RESOLVE group news, we are THISCLOSE to becoming official!  I just have to finalize the meeting place, get RESOLVE the info, and we're good to go!  Woot!



Your Shape

I bought my hubby Your Shape for Xbox Kinect for Christmas.  I finally got around to using it this weekend.  (because, you know, I buy him presents that *I* want to play with!) 

Holy.  Crap. 

First off, this game is amazing.  Creepy how far we've come from old school Nintendo.  This game measures your body for you.  It tells you how long your legs and arms are, where your joints are, how you stand, etc.  Then it takes your picture for your profile.  Then you do a fitness test, and it takes that score, and plans exercises for you based on that.  Yeah, all mine were squat based.  I hate squats. LOL  I was feeling ok on Saturday evening after I played.  A bit sore, but that "yeah, I just worked out" sore.  Sunday I thought I was going to die.  My thighs, hips, and butt hurt SO BAD.  It hurts to go from standing to sitting.  It hurts to go from sitting to standing.  It hurts to walk.  It hurts to breathe. 

So what did I do?  I went and played volleyball!  Actually while I was playing my muscles did loosen up quite a bit.  I've learned that all my serving power comes from my hips though.  I couldn't hit that stupid ball over the net to save my life.  We won both games though, so there's that.

Anyway, moral of the story is, if you have an Xbox and Kinect, go buy this game.  Right now.  It's fabulous and will absolutely kick your butt.

Just a couple quick updates

Soooo, today was weigh in day.  I lost THREE pounds! This makes me very happy.  I'm hoping I'm breaking out of this stupid plateau.  ::knock on wood::

I talked to the rep from RESOLVE today.  She's passing along the information to the head honcho chick, and that should be it!  They're gonna get us put up on the website, send me out my information packet and such, and we're official!  Woohoo!!   I've got a couple calls out for places to have it, so hopefully we can have our first meeting next month! 

Well, that's one way to cut calories...

So, Monday morning I had a pulmonary function test.  (More on that in a bit.)  So I woke up and got around for the day.  My stomach felt a bit wonky, but I figured it was just because I hadn't eaten since about 7:30 the night before.  Usually I snack around 9:30 or so.  Went and did my test, and still felt...off.  I was supposed to meet a friend in town for lunch and a movie, and had some time to kill, so I met my mom at Target.  Yeah, that's where it all went downhill.

As we were leaving, the omg-I'm-gonna-hurl feeling came by for a visit.  So I literally sat in the Target bathroom stall floor for probably 15 minutes trying to convince myself I was not going to pass out (or die) and I could make it to my truck to drive home.  Texted my friend and told her I was gonna need to take a raincheck.  Since she's awesome, she was already in that neck of the woods, so she came to rescue me. Walked me out to the truck and made sure I was ok to drive and such.  I did make it home, and proceeded to sleep all day.

It's hard to eat when, you know, you want to hurl.  Or when you're alseep.  I had a total of about 500 calories on Monday, and it was all Saltines.  Awesome.  Tuesday I stayed home from work.  By Tuesday night, I was feeling a bit better, so I had some noodles from my favorite Chinese place.  That upped my calorie intake a bit. LOL  Feel close enough to human to go to work today, but the thought of eating still makes me a bit queasy.  We will see how it goes.

Now, back to the test I had.  I took the first section of the test, which was the part to see how hard and fast you can blow out, and the tech says "Yeah, we're going to give you a breathing treatment."  Awesome.  After the breathing treatment though, I rocked it. LOL  The second part was the absorption test.  I had to breathe in as deep as I could, then hold it for a few seconds, then breathe out.  I kinda failed that part too, but that's not surprising given my sarcoidsosis diagnosis.  Now the fun part.  The third part was to see about lung volume.  I rocked this part so much.  The tech says they see the highest numbers in people that exercise regularly, and he was very impressed with my numbers. :)  He said a lot of techie stuff that he had to dumb down for me.  Basically though, the lung learns to compensate, and it can be trained like a muscle.  When you exercise, it learns to take in more air the harder you work.  And mine works great. LOL  It's the little things in life, ya know? :)

And for the RESOLVE update:  I got an email back this morning, and I should be expecting a phone call for the phone interview!  Yay!!! 

Is it a plateau if I'm just lazy?

According to the scale, I have lost zero weight so far this month.  Depending on the day, I may have even gained a pound or two.  Ack.  Thing is, I know exactly what the issue is.

The issue is that I'm getting burned out.  Not on wanting to be healthy, and not on exercise.  I actually love going to the gym.  I love how it makes me feel for the rest of the day, and I love how because I do go, I can do other things in life that I couldn't before.  Like walk up the 5 steps to my second-floor apartment and not be out of breath. LOL  I don't have any desire to stop counting calories, because I know exactly what will happen if I do stop.  I'm just tired I guess.  My heart isn't in it like it used to be.  It's more a habit now, which I know is a good thing.  But it's harder for me to get up in the mornings and go to the gym because I've lost that fire.  I kinda don't care much anymore. 

I know the logical answer would be to either a) relax on it and take a "break" from being so strict.  Go on maintenance mode and just focus on not ganing, or b) push through it and just suck it up. 

The problem with option a...I just did that!  That's what the entire month of December was!  I ate junk food for a month.  It's very difficult to go back to eating non-junk food after that.  The issue with option b...when I tell myself I HAVE to do something, I get rebellious.  I know it makes no sense because nobody else is telling me what I can or cannot do.  But it's kind of like when you tell yourself you won't think about chocolate cake.  What's the one thing you will think about?  Chocolate cake.  So telling myself "you have to eat only healthy food and no junk and you will work out 5 days a week for an hour.  Period!"  is the best way to get me to do the exact opposite. LOL

So my solution?  I splurged this weekend.  A lot, actually.  And to be honest, I feel awful, physically.  I'm tired, I'm lethargic, and all I want to do is sit around and veg out.  I don't like this feeling.  I'm hoping that going nuts this weekend, and feeling how crappy I used to feel all the time will help motivate me to behave from now on. LOL

In other news, I did hear back from RESOLVE.  I returned my Host Application, and I should hear back within two weeks.  If everything on the application looks good, they will want to schedule a phone interview.  If that goes well, they will put the group on the list on the website, and send me a packet on how to get started marketing the group and such.  Yay!

I'm a terrible gym rat.

I skipped the gym again today.  I know, I know.  It's awful! 

In my defense, it apparently snowed like a big dog last night.  The weatherman was calling for between 9-18 inches between last night and today.  I don't know that we got THAT much, but it did snow, and I'm really not looking forward to driving to work today.  Even in Alaska, when it snows, people get dumb.

I had a slight non-scale setback last night.  I went to Nordstrom to buy boots.  I want the knee-high boots that have a motorcycle boot feel to them.  You know, buckles and stuff.  Found a pair I LOVED.  I couldn't get it up over my calf.  Found another pair I really liked.  Same deal.  When did my calves get so big again?? LOL  Then I went home and looked online at the width on them.  The first pair was 14", the second was 12.  TWELVE inches.  Yeah my calf is still like 16 or something.  But you know what?  I have a rocking calf muscle, so screw them and their tiny legs anyway.

Plus, my husband rocks.  As we left Nordstrom, we passed Journey's.  There were boots on the wall.  They're beautiful.  Amazing.  I've wanted these boots for years.  He let me try them on.  Then he let me buy them!  So, I am now the proud owner of Converse Chuck Taylor BOOTS.  Yes.  I own Chuck boots.



Aren't they fabulous??  If I could get away with wearing them at work, I would absolutely wear them every single day.  Love. These.  Shoes. 

Just an update on the support group... I'm still waiting to hear back from RESOLVE.  Unfortunately, the email address I was given kept coming back as undeliverable.  So I called the main number and got the email address for the woman who "does all the support group stuff."  I sent her an email yesterday, so hopefully she gets back to me soon!  Thanks for all the love and support with this everybody.  :)

I guess I should practice what I preach...

After posting the blog yesterday, I was doing a lot more thinking.  I can post all I want about how these subjects need to be more well known, and brought into the spotlight.  Women need not be ashamed if they are dealing with m/c, pregnancy loss, or infertility.  But if I don't actually DO something to help the process, what's the point?

So, I've been in contact with RESOLVE about starting a support group in my area.

I'm kind of terrified. LOL

I'm waiting to hear back from them with an information packet, and more details on how to proceed.  I'll keep you updated!

And now, let's get personal.

Today, we're going to chat about a taboo topic.  ::GASP::

Miscarriage and pregnancy loss. 

As you know (or will know if you read back a few posts) this is a subject kind of personal to me, seeing as how I'm just coming off a miscarriage of my own.  While my family and friends were supportive and amazing, I still felt kind of alone.  Why was this happening to me?  Women have healthy babies every day.  Why me?  Why am I such a freak that I can't carry a baby?  Then I did some research.

According to The American Pregnancy Association, here's some stats on m/c and pregnancy loss:

There are approximately 6 million pregnancies every year throughout the United States:

4,058,000 live births
1,995,840 pregnancy losses

Wait what?  1,995,840 pregnancy losses??  That's right.  This is a common occurance, as sad as it is.  Why don't you hear more about it? 

I understand that the road to a baby is a very private, personal journey.  But what about when there's a bump - or a roadblock, minor detour, or the whole stinking road just got ripped up? 

There are awareness walks and events for all forms of cancer, for MS, for all manner of other diseases.  As well there should be.  But what about infertility, miscarriage, and pregnancy loss?  Where's the awareness for that?  It happens, and it sucks.  A lot.   There is an organization that is trying to bring infertility more into the spotlight.  Resolve is the National Infertility Association.  It's a great resource if you or someone you know are dealing with infertility.

Now that I've said all that, let me be clear...THIS DOES NOT MEAN YOU SHOULD GO ASK SOMEONE ABOUT THEIR REPRODUCTIVE PLANS.  Ever.  Unless a woman is physically giving birth in front of you at that moment, do not ask if she is - or when she plans to become - pregnant.   Just don't do it.  While yes, the subject of infertility and pregnancy loss as a whole shouldn't be taboo, a person's journey is none of your business until they bring it up.  That couple you ask when they're going to have kids could have just been to the doctor for her D&C after a missed m/c.  That woman you ask if she wants to have kids could be going though infertility treatments because she can't get pregnant.  I can tell you from personal experience that when people ask your plans for children when it's all you want out of life but just can't get pregnant, it rips your heart out.   

So please, be available if one of your friends or family comes to you for support.  Do research on helping someone through their rough time.  Look up helpful things to say/do.  Look up what not to say/do.  Don't be afraid to ask more questions, once the subject has already been brought up.

Why yes, I am kind of hardcore.

Soo, this morning, my alarm goes off at 5:00, just like it always does.  I was not impressed, just like I never am.  I spent about 10 minutes debating whether or not I really wanted to roll out of my nice cozy bed and go out and play in the -5 (or -8, depending on which thermometer I was looking at) temp to go to the gym.  It is *really* cozy in my bed ya know.  So I got up and put on my workout clothes. 

Here, actually, is non-scale victory #1.  I worked out in my husband's undershirt.  The undershirt that I used to refuse to wear because it touched me and was way too tight.  Today it was loose enough to work out in.  Woot. 

Anyway, I got to the gym and did my normal 30 minute Express Circuit at Planet Fitness.  Except there were a couple of people hogging the machines I needed at the end, so I went off and did some backwards crunches.  The kind where you lay flat on a bench, and bring your knees up to your chest.  Holy lower ab workout, batman!  After those two people left, I went back and finished my circuit.  Well, at this point I had only burned like 300 calories.  That's just not enough for me.

Insert non-scale victory #2.  So, when I started working out a few years ago (only lasted a few months) I attempted to use the Arc Trainer at Planet Fitness.  Yeah...that didn't work out so well for me.  3 minutes in, and I was done.  Fixing to fall off of it, head pounding b/c my heart rate was so high kind of done.  Today, I rocked that Arc Trainer for 20 minutes, and only got out of my zone ONCE.  And only by 2 BPM (beats per minute). And I was able to adjust so that I got right back into my zone with no issue.  Totally made my whole morning!  For those of you who don't know, this is an arc trainer: 

And I rocked a total calorie burn of 541 for 50 minutes of exercise.  Woot.

OH!  Speaking of awesome calorie burns.  Go buy Just Dance 3.  Right now.  It's fabulous.  I bought it for the hubby for Christmas, and we finally played last night.  SO MUCH FUN.  (Also, I stomped his butt.  I win.)  I did about 4-5 songs, total of 30 minutes.  I only turned my heart rate monitor on during the songs, so it didn't count my heart rate during down time.  Just during the songs, I burned a total of 211 calories.  Not bad for my "rest day" huh?  Love!

Friend Making Mondays

So my sister frequents a blog called All the Weigh.  It's another weight loss journey blog.  It's pretty fabulous.  I tend to lurk there quite often myself.

Anyway, on Mondays, she does Friend Making Mondays.  She posts a topic, and you blog on it, then post your blog link in the comments.  Yay for shared readers!  I've decided to participate today. Fun, right?  Right.

Today's subject is Goals for 2012.  I know I've touched on this a little, but it's good to keep goals in the forefront of your mind so you don't forget them.

My goals for 2012 are:

• Lose at least 1 pound a week.  I particpate in a challenge on the Lose It! forums, and I'd really like to help my team out by posting some nice losses.  As long as I lose at least 1 a week, I'll be happy. 
• Get pregnant and have a healthy take home baby.  Obviously, this goal will render goal one moot, but that's ok.  I want to have a healthy pregnancy, and if that includes not losing weight, I am perfectly ok with that.  Obviously this does not mean go all discovery channel fat kid, but not losing a pound a week is acceptable if I'm pregnant.
• Get back on track with my healthy habits.  I had a terrible eating month last month, and I also slacked on the workouts.  It was nice to "relax" a bit, but it's very hard to get back into good habits.  I'd much rather just stay in good habits from now on, thanks.

So there's my goals for the year.  So far, I'm doing pretty well.  I have worked out both yesterday and today.  I went with 1 of 4 today, and she showed me the routine her personal trainer taught her.  I found my triceps, and they were not impressed with being woken up.  I'm not entirely convinced they're not planning a revolt.  Seriously. LOL

Thanks for stopping by!

Measurements Day!

Today was measurement day.  Oh dear. LOL  I have not been good the past month.  I've been very bad, even.  I've skimped on the working out, I upped my calorie intake, and haven't been eating healthy foods.  It's been ugly.

That being said - I DID NOT GAIN ANY INCHES!  I even lost 3 total!  Woot.  I lost 1 from just under my bust, 1 from just above my belly button, and .25 from both my hips and left bicep.  I'll take it!  I also am at the same weight I was at Dec. 1.  Like I said before, given my crappy eating habits over the past month, I'll take it!

Yesterday I ate pizza rolls.  A lot of pizza rolls.  I feel like warmed up crap today.  Next time I want pizza rolls, remind me of this ok?  If the grocery store is open, I'm totally buying them out of green beans.  I miss vegetables!